Only A Kiss

One more dance. Just one last lie.

I said—
just one more drink.
And then I promise
I’ll be a good boy
again.

But you didn’t listen.
Maybe you weren't there
at all.

Like you knew
I was full of shit.

Like you knew
I was empty of love.

I said—
just one more dance.
And then
I’ll tell you everything.

I’ll tell you—
it was her smile.
Her foolish eyes.
Her party dress.
The neon lights.

The cigarette burn
she left on my wrist.

The bass shaking
my teeth loose.

The booze
invading my throat
a little too fast.

I’ll tell you—
how horny she was
despite the scent
of her crimson
desecrating the night.

I’ll tell you—
it couldn't have been me.

It was only a kiss.

And I wish
you were deaf enough
to miss the way
I said—
it was everything
but this.

I told you I’d still be myself.
That I wouldn’t change.
Even in darkness.
Even alone.
Even away.

You didn't open your mouth.
So I kept talking
until I no longer believed
my own lies.

So I finally shut up.

You knew
I’d see you
only with my eyes closed.

You knew
I’d notice you
only once you were gone.

source

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