19 Comments
User's avatar
nina's avatar

And I wish

you were deaf enough

to miss the way

I said—

it was everything

but only a kiss.

maybe it’s body memory, maybe it’s the writer, but—

whew.

Emmett Tatter's avatar

So cool. Master at this you are 🫡✨✨✨ respect

Night Cracks's avatar

Thank you, Emmett 💛

Anomie's avatar

Can you stop writing stuff that makes folks tingle?

Start writing drivel or imma have to block you.

Whew! 🔥

Night Cracks's avatar

It tingles because it's true.

Drivel? Fine!

“Blablablabla.”

No block now, aight?

Anomie's avatar

Honesty was felt in every syllable. 😉

Ayo, you forgot the “de” in the blah de blah. Uncultured swine.

I’ll let you off for now but you’re on thin ice!

Night Cracks's avatar

You're pushing the revolution so hard...

Anomie's avatar

“When she talks, I hear the revolution.

In her hips… there’s revolution.

When she walks, the revolution’s comin’!

In her kiss, watch out the revolution!”

You just reminded me of that song, you’re a ledge. Thanks! 🫡

Night Cracks's avatar

🖤🖤🖤

Gub's avatar

The ending made me think ‘you don’t know what you got, ‘til it’s gone.’ Regretful and raw

Night Cracks's avatar

Works for most things.

It’s our curse.

Thanks, Gub 🖤

Untamed Eulogy's avatar

This one really got to me. I love how the speaker keeps trying to justify everything until the excuses finally collapse under their own weight. It feels raw, messy, and painfully honest !

And those last two lines… damn(out of my words) They completely reframe everything that came before them. You have such a way of letting the emotion build without forcing it. Utterly gorgeous piece !! 🩷🖤

Night Cracks's avatar

I think it only ends once we admit we’re lying to ourselves.

I’m really glad you liked it, Ashu.

Your comments always mean a lot 🖤🩷

Siddhartha Mukherjee's avatar

“You kept talking / until I no longer believed / my own lies.” There it is. BUSTED! By himself!

😄 And then — “it was everything / but only a kiss.” Ouch! Everything... reduced to only.

But that ending? “You knew / I’d notice you / only once you were gone.” Too bloody late.

Guilty! Messy! Haunting! I'M SUBSCRIBING!

I write at The Reflective State, meandering through reflection, humour, travel, history and fiction. If curiosity brings you my way, I'd genuinely love to know what you think.

Night Cracks's avatar

Thanks for the awesome comment, Siddhartha 🖤

I'll definitely take a peek!

Noor's avatar

You knew

I’d see you

only with my eyes closed.👍love to connect!

Noor's avatar

Hello🌹🌹